As a business owner, I am always “selling.” Selling our product, our services, our company, our brand. It is a skill that no one ever trained me on, and something that I never attended a class or a seminar on, etc.. Selling is something that I have been able to establish a knack for on my own. I also, if I may, happen to think I am pretty decent at it. I have closed large deals, small deals and all kinds of deals in between. Selling can be very rewarding. The best part is, I’m not really a salesman. If I sell anything, I sell trust, education and a genuine interest and relationship. For me, that approach leads to business. I don’t claim to be any expert in sales, but I find that a consultative, educational, relational sales approach is much more effective then the bulldog, aggressive “buy my service now, you need it!” approach.
That said, this week I received one of the most annoying, unpractical, and lamest sales pitches ever. The pitch was so bad that, in hindsight I realized the sales rep never even told me the name of the company he was with. My only recollection was that he worked for an organization that puts vendors like us in front of fortune 2000 CMO’s (Chief Marketing Officers). They put on those events where they invite the CMO’s for free and charge vendors a fee to get guaranteed face time and a set number of meetings. Granted, this is a great market, and definitely the audience we would love to talk to about our products and services, so I was at least a little curious. Being a cold call, the sales rep got me 15 minutes before I had a deadline I was working on. Before I was about to tell him that I wanted to hear more but to please ring me later, he persisted with the usual “leading questions” and then immediately created the “sense of urgency” based on the fact that I didn’t give him the automatic, “I am not interested, goodbye” response, which normally accompanies a cold call. He immediately began working the, “I have to rope you in NOW while I have you on the phone and have your attention,” vibe. Most of you know exactly what I am talking about.
So, I play along for another 2 minutes to learn more after having already told him upfront that my marketing dollars are already budgeted for 2007 on things I know work for us. This idiot then tells me that he has been trying to get in touch with me all week to no avail, (I never received one voice mail or a message from my staff), and is very apologetic about the fact that right now, email marketing vendors are extremely hot on the list for the CMO attendees, and the slot for the participating vendor must be filled by 4pm Friday (he called me on Thursday). But here is the kicker, Mr. On the Ball then proceeds to roll off of his tounge that the price tag for participation in his event is a mere $66,000.00. He says it in the tone that makes me think the next thing out of his mouth will be, “So, Mr. Cangialosi, are you ready to make a purchasing decision today?” Are you fucking kidding me?
I was very polite and told him that it wasn’t going to happen, but that I appreciated the opportunity. I also gave him my email address and told him to send me more information and that I would be happy to read up on his organization, the events they put on, and consider him for the future. Then I received the “Well how much would something like this be worth to you?” question, and I got really turned off. I gently reminded him that I was on a deadline and to please send me info, I had to go. Remember, at this point Mr. Circling the Drain is lucky to still have me on the line. This far into the conversation, and after asking him, I still have no idea what company he is with, what the name of the event is that he is pitching me, what date(s) or location it will take place, and more importantly who is coming, etc.. Yet, he had the balls to roll out the $66,000.00 price tag associated with it and asked me if I was interested in moving forward. That, in case you haven’t picked up by now, is simply a HORRIBLE sales approach.
But wait, there’s more….
At this point, I have already told him, in the world of sales that, “I will NOT be PLACING an ORDER with YOU,” as loud and as clear as I could. There was no sale taking place here, but I did say with 100% clarity, “please add me to your prospect list, I am interested in what you have to offer, just not this time around.” I told him again to send me some info, i.e the website of the event(s) so I can learn more about what they do. He stated he couldn’t do that because the site required a user/pass to access it. Somehow, he was unable to email that to me, for whatever lame reason. That said, I had some time between calls in the afternoon and told him no promises at all, but to try me back after lunch and he can walk me through their site. I was really trying to work with the guy after having already been 80% turned off. But, in all honesty, I did want to know more about his event and what his company does.
He called back after lunch, I was busy at the time, so I ended the call with a VERY specific statement and said “I am sorry I can’t do the walk-through now, try me in an hour, but when you do call back just dial my extension and if I don’t answer leave a message or try again later, worst case try me tomorrow.” I then went on to clarify that he should not “zero out” and try to get in touch with any of my staff and have them go look for me to take the call, but again just to try my extension or leave a message. (I should have known by now, just by listening to the words that were coming out of my mouth what I should of expected.) So it will come as no surprise that while I was spending my only 15 minutes of downtime in the afternoon, that one of my staff members came in to tell me there was “an urgent call for me,” and it was “someone that you are expecting to hear from right now.” Now my friend, you have crossed the point of no return. I no longer care who you are, who your with, what you have to offer, you are now officially just an annoying sales rep who is now blacklisted in my world. After catching me on a good day, and being extremely patient with him, giving him the opportunity to sell me on his organization, he blew it by not respecting my simple request. In his mind he must have still thought there was a chance that I would buy into his current event and 4pm Friday deadline BS line.
I picked up the line from the conference room and immediately Mr. Desperate to Make My Quota asks me how I am doing. I remind him of what I specifically told him earlier, tell him I am not available, and hung up the phone on him. I was done. He got the point and didn’t call back.
The lesson in all of this is simple, don’t take this approach if you are trying to sell ANYTHING. Think about how disconnected from reality this guy was. He is trying to sell me what in his world is a $66,000.00 opportunity almost on the spot! Granted if you walk away from one deal with a Fortune 2000 CMO you probably would get a great ROI, that is obviously not the point. He should have called me months before the deadline, i.e. last fall, established a repore with me, learned how I prefer to be sold to (everyone has their own preference), and then proceed to sell me on his event, answer all of my questions, garnish me with references, and make a compelling case for why I should set aside some of my 2007 marketing budget for his opportunity. He did none of the above.
Again, I don’t claim to be any expert in sales, but I do have what most of us call common sense. People don’t like to be cold called in general, that said, it can be effective for specific markets. If you do happen to get someone on the phone (whether its a cold call, a referral or a inbound lead), don’t be aggressive, listen to your prospect, honor their requests, build a repore, establish some kind of relationship with them. People have to feel comfortable with YOU before they buy anything from you or your organization. Most sales start with YOU, the person, the individual. And by all means, don’t EVER try to sell $66,000.00 worth of ANYTHING to someone over the phone and tell the person that they have less than 24 hours to make a decision 
